Brick Walls

One of the years largest series is coming up, At The Movies.  This is our definitive bring in series specifically designed for people who don't venture into church buildings often.  This is an exciting time creating a buzz around our campus specifically with volunteers.  We transform our entire building into a movie set...this year's design team has captured Gotham City.  In Gotham city we will feature "screenshots" from different super-hero movies.  We have a bat cave, Wayne manner, the bat symbol glowing in the rafters, the incredible hulk crushing buildings and superman saving the plane from the helpless sports fans at the baseball stadium.  Our main lobby is designed as a movie theater lobby, we have movie theater candy available...its quite the six flags endeavor.  Our volunteers have envisioned this and are in the process of creating it all with the advisement of staff.  The piece i really owned as a personal volunteer project was to transform a 45 foot long section of our hallway into a 20 foot tall brick building.  As i had volunteers flowing in and out this weekend to construct what will be the movie theater building in our town (the entrance to our auditorium) i was tired and worn out.  The brick wall really seemed to symbolize the most recent season of ministry for me.  I've often wrestled with being in ministry constantly having to look back to my calling that got me into it all in the first place, err God ha!  One of the questions i evaluate my impact with is whether or not i would have more impact as a small group leader than as the leader of the whole ministry.  I need to see progress, i need to see God working through me to validate investing my life...wrong or not.  This last season of ministry has been one that has swayed in and out of feeling like God is making a difference through me.  As i begin to sprint forward with momentum moving the students God has called me to connect with him i feel as though i hit brick walls.  Something happens, attitudes change and for no sought after reason i get paralyzed into a crawl.  This has happened two or three times recently, frankly its frustrating.  I desire to sprint with others towards God for longer seasons...i want the marathon really.  I can't really complain though, because God is teaching me a lot about who i am, what i need and most importantly...he's in control.  It's really odd to tell God that its up to him, to look outside of myself almost constantly simply so things keep rolling-I'm still waiting to be struck by lightning.  There is an ebb and flow in ministry that is unexplainable.  Sometimes it's when core students graduate and the ministry suffers, sometimes its when leaders lose their investment, when staff gets worn out and spiritually dry, but most of the time i feel its unexplainable.  This isn't because i cant think of a good reason, its just the only good reason i can think of is outside of anything other than God.  We join God in what he is doing around us and sometimes he stops.  God chooses to stop me with some brick walls.  As I'm processing (DG there ya go) through this its comforting to be learning that God is not shutting things down, but merely making sure all the bricks are straight before moving forward.  The mortar has to set the foundation has to settle.  This becomes an issue of God not moving at the speed of Tyler, but at the speed of God.  Our ministry is moving at the speed of God, my life is, my marriage everything seems to be moving right along at his pace.  Soon enough the pieces will be in place for a long season of running with God where he will no doubt wear me out, but i have confidence that he too is building another brick wall to run me right into.